How fucked up is the entire concept of The Parent Trap? These parents have twins but want a divorce so they decide their best course of action is to just each take one and never speak to each other again.
"They seem awfully close," Bruce points out, eyes on the screen that shows the room that Steve and Tony are in.
On said screen, Steve and Tony, both with more grey in their hair and more lines on their faces, are pressing their shoulders together like it’s something they do every day without noticing.
"They’ve known each other for what, twenty years?" Clint folds his arms. "People get close over that time period. It just means they’re good teammates."
Steve opens his mouth to say something, but then stops with his mouth hanging open as the on-screen Steve links his fingers with Tony before bringing Tony’s hand up to kiss the gold band on Tony’s ring finger.
"Or you could all ignore me," Clint says, and everyone watches the screen in silent disbelief as older-Tony tilts his head up gratefully and lets Steve kiss him.
It’s a chaste kiss, lasting less than two seconds, but it’s obviously something they’ve done into the ground, and Steve watches his older self and identifies the feeling in his stomach as jealousy- he’s never been so familiar with another person, at least not like that.
On screen, Steve sighs. “We’re going to miss our dinner reservations.”
Tony squeezes his hand. “Depends on how good Reed is at this point. We could be back with hours to spare.” At Steve’s look, he laughs, and the lines in his face bunch. “But we’re never that lucky, I know. We’ll probably get involved in a Skrull invasion.”
Steve starts stroking his thumb absently against Tony’s hand. “The SHIELD agents are still intimidated by us in this time. I had forgotten what that was like.”
"Well, in our time’s SHIELD agents’ defense, after walking in on us naked for the third time, it’s kind of hard to stay intimidated by either of us," Tony says, and Steve snorts and nudges him with his shoulder.
"Half of those times were your fault."
Tony mock-gasps. “Fine, but you initiated most of the times on the Helicarrier.”
"I’m offended and hurt," Steve says blandly. "I am an American icon, you just insulted the flag, I order you to recite the national anthem three times backwards, I can do this, I’m Captain America-"
Older-Steve grins and stops talking when Tony tells him to shut up and then kisses him silent.
Behind Steve, he heard Tony- his Tony- his time’s Tony- say, “Huh,” thoughtfully, and Steve looks at him as he pushes down the nerves.
Tony shrugs, avoiding his eyes. “Never thought you’d have the guts to do it on the Helicarrier, Cap.”
Steve stays silent, unable to choose between looking at his team or at the screen, where the two people there are looking at each other with obvious love. In compromise, he looks at the floor, and onscreen, he hears himself laugh in a way he doesn’t think he ever has.
life tip whatever dumb ass name you get siri to call you is what your iphone automatically signs your emails as. i have been applying to jobs for 2 months as queef.